Darling what is really really most important for me, is if you really feel and understand :
- I asked peaceful questions
- In what way you didn't answer me normal yesterday.
In the future I really hope you can prevent it to happen again, because we already discussed about it , and also because :
By my side I know how to recognize what I call "your angry or bored mode".
I think it happens of course not everyday but when you don't like the subject of discuss (which is the case in particular about your parents borrow).
Why I reacted strong about this, it's because it is starting to change my way to exchange with you : Yesterday I remember I was thinking about the best diplomatic way to ask the question about the 75000 bath borrow, and choose to start by making a positive remark that you did a good job in the excel file.
If I start to think "okay this subject she doesn't like, whatever the way I will ask, she will answer that way I don't like and we will get angry again", then I will start to select the subjects I discuss with you :
Difficult subjects necessary only for me => I start and prepare fighting mode ,
Difficult other subjects (how to help your parents for example) => I don't care.
Step by step, we will discuss only about some neutral subjects, until someday we will realize that our couple cannot discuss problems or difficult things. Couples having that kind of problem don't have a good future.
I understand your apologize and feel better, now that we exchanged (again) about this communication problem that I hope we can solve.
About job we know together that it is not the problem : when we can find for you, you can do or no up to you. Important is I can start to analyze your parents situation and think to solutions.